LOOM OF CREATION
DVD-film, 120. min., by bruno demattio
Forword to the synopsis :
In the summer 2005, beginning august, I got very ill. My left side got impaired in movement as well in the visual perception. I got into christophsbad in göppingen (11.8.) to make a check-up: it was a braintumor I suffered from. what a shock. Then was there the operation at the university clinic in tübingen (UKT): successful, but a tiny tumor had to be left in for liferisks. One could radiate it I was told. Back to christophsbad they argued there should be a primetumor sitting on my lung, which really they found out in the clinic am eichert, in göppingen, where I had to undergo another operation of my upper left lung. Now (1.11.2005) I am in a radiation-programm, for the braintumor and the lymph-nodes on my chest, which should last til end of november. All details of this events I wrote down in a long storyboard, interviews with doctors, with friends, as well reflections, thoughts, notes plus hundreds of digital fotos to document this inner drama.
Inside soon it became clear to me, that not only I wanted to make a foto-CD, but moreover a complete film about the medical world I was wandering around (part I) as well a film about my friends who supported me enourmously (part II) .
The complete storyboard/synopsis/filmscript I wrote down within 10 days after my brainoperation in UKT - very unusual - and it needs little change. So there is something authentic about my inner world I report on as well that incredible ring of love, warmth and energy which developed around me thru my friends, who supported me in these difficult times: and this energy transported me over weeks to get out of it. I realised that love is a transformer. Over these weeks I got from about 80-100 people and friends (some did call me several times a week) phonecalls to comfort me and send me their energy and love, even from far away places like toronto, new york, capetown or dharamsala. Quite a few of my friends started prayers for me-prayer has its own force I believe.
There are about 10 doctors and therapists (all of them I got in close contact ) who will give me short readings/interviews from their work/research- field for the film (like MRT, brainfunctions, CT, alternative medicine, energy transformation, readings thru the computer-systems, hallucinogenics (after brainoperation I was on a trip), chemo+radiation-therapy as well new methods/tranings on rehab-centres.
directly after my brainoperation I experienced something extraordinary: a satori, as zen-people would call it YOU SEE SKY, a rebirth, a transformation, being bathed in light, experiencing revealing forces, or as charles tart would call altered states of consciousness or william james oceanic feelings - so much for part I, the medical side, but it would not be whole, if not including my world without my friends: we traveled together, we have grown together, we do mirror each other. So it will be a film as well on bondage, growth, friendship, creativity, the transpersonal, east and west, love and humanness. About we all share love for the arts, nature, poetry, zen and silence - a film about wholeness. Actually last year I organized a big show inside the kreissparkasse göppingen with the title 1+1=3, the whole is more than the sum of its parts. For the catalogue I wrote a long introduction, an essay on wholeness. The film will be as well a report on borderline-experiences, a journey I had to travel thru. So sickness as a new chance and if I am right a new man will be born. And right now I see the focus shifting from the superficial to the existential, the flow of awareness becomes awareness itself: towards the centre of being . Not to forget the three big L`s - called the secrets of life- as there are LOVE LIFE and LAUGHTER.
my friends, real people, give contributions thru their work. With interviews, statements, music, talks and readings. Unfortunately not all can be taken in, just a few who contacted me during this time, but interesting enough to show up the panorama of life we all hang in that network we all share together: the inexplicable miracle of life: therefore quite appropriate the title LOOM OF CREATION, as everything is interweaving with everything and suddenly it can become a film of public interest: A JOURNEY - A FILM ABOUT YOU AND ME. It happened to me and it can happen to you. So it will be a film on medicine, culture, on philosophy and poetry and arts and live + death and nature as well. And of course a film about a healing process thru medicine and friends - both parts make it a whole. Naturally I do my personal contribution to evoke self-healing forces, like a daily routine: in the morning breathing-meditation, jocobsen-detente, visualization, NLP-focusing, in the afternoon radiation at the eichert, coming back walks outside and then my painting-therapy: a large water-color-series - my inner pictures -, which will be finished when the healing process is ending. in january 2006 I should go into a rehab-centre (my favorite place is allensbach/lake of constance, just because I am born at the lake and I will be reborn at the same lake). I very much like that Idea.
So really this film LOOM OF CREATION we could start middle january 2006.
the filmteam stands as there are my friends andreas kalias (camera), andreas bressmer (camera), guntram gerst (foto-design) , barbara heuss-czisch (editor) , katrin biallas (organization + communication) , hartmut willier (dramaturgist + speaker) and of course sascha ritter (assistant director) and finally myself who will be the director. Susanne babila (working as a TV-journalist for SWR 3 in stuttgart and TV-station in baden-baden will give us advice). we want to make a professional film. My friends contribute music: like wolfgang kallert ( blues-songs with guitar), manuela lechler (with saxophone), sam gopal (with tabla) and wolfgang kiwus (with computer-music).
There will be a whole range of foto-portraits and artwork of my friends included as inserts. I want to give personal statements thru my work and talks in my studio.
The film itself starts like a journey easy going down to tuscany,which we (sascha and me) did in june/july, coming back over carano in the dolomites (my ancestors place-searching for roots) and over the paso di salle, high up in the dolomites, then coming home to geislingen-weiler, where the drama unfolded...